Saturday and Sunday - October 29 & 30, 2011

Dan picked up the birthday cake on Saturday and headed to MB around 2:30. Snow started falling around 3 so Dan. Popa and Momu enjoyed a scrumptious cake. Dan asked Popa how it felt to be 95 and he said 'good, better than being dead' and then he laughed.

Snow was coming in fast so Dan left. All of Simsbury and Granby and surrounding towns are without power - that started around 4 pm on Saturday.

Major snow storm - war zone where we live -

Dan was able to barely get out and arrived at MB Sunday around 2:30 - as soon as he arrived they both asked for pizza and beer - Dan had to explain what was going on. We expect power to be out for a week!!

I wished Popa a happy birthday and told him I would see him in a week.

Dan left MB to find a hotel for the night - all either without power or sold out. But he found a pizza place open and ordered a pie and brought it to M&P and then will head home for another powerless and freezing cold night - I think we all need to applaud his efforts during this birthday weekend!

Friday October 28, 2011

An awesome thing happened today - Momu and Popa are now both occupying the same room #108 which faces out to the court yard. I was in flight while this happened. Dan went over during the move and brought over their TV. He took pictures - which he will have to post because a flaw with the iPad prevents me from posting pics to the blog

Thursday October 27, 2011

Dan and I arrived at 5:00 pm with the promised Chinese food - Won Ton Soup, Spare Ribs, General Tsao Chicken and Spring Rolls - hey at their age, what the heck!!  We all went into the Activity Room and sat down - I served M&P the hot soup and boy did they like it.  I brought over a large quart and they could have easily shared a small one and still had left over - then I served them both a spare rib, some rice, and 2 small pieces of chicken and one egg roll for Momu and a cold can of Bud.  Momu was in heaven and Popa starred at his food.  He had trouble with his fork today for some reason.  He was also spitting like crazy tonight.  So after about an hour - Momu took a few bites of her spare rib, and ate one small piece of chicken and her egg roll.  Popa ate one piece of chicken.  I cleaned up and then gave each of them an ice cream cup

We chatted during dinner - Momu's stories today were:  Townsend Harris School/entrance test and Basement Renovation - but today was the first time she said 'care givers' vs. mentioning Joanne by name...hmmmm.....

I am leaving for my trip tomorrow (Friday) and won't be back until the following Friday night - close to 11:30 pm.  Dan leaves for a business trip on Sunday and won't be back until end of week as well.  I told them I won't be seeing them for an entire week - they were sad.  Dan will visit with them tomorrow and also on Saturday - we ordered a great cake tonight - Chocolate cake, boston creme filling in between layers, and fresh whipped cream topping - Dan will pick it up on Saturday and celebrate Popa's 95th one day early - we felt it was important for someone to be there - although we had to tell him what Sunday was - and he was funny - we said it is your birthday and w/out hesitating, he said 'well then, happy birthday'.  We all got a good laugh at that.

We walked them back to their rooms - opened up cards they received from Valerie and Lysbeth Kennedy.  It was snowing outside (YES, snow on October 27th) so we headed out around 6:15.  On our way out, Popa said to us: "You guys are the best!"  Momu said we were the perfect couple.  Yep, as the author of this blog, I get to toot my own horn and Dan's as well!!

Wednesday, October 26, 2011

Where do I begin... it was only me tonight (Dan bowls on Wed nights).  I wasn't going to go, got out of my PT appt and was feeling good but stiff, but once I got home, I decided to get in the car and go to MB - I needed gas and the gas station is right there, so what the heck.

I arrived at 5:30 - Momu and Popa were in the dining room.  Popa, as usual, looked surprised and happy to see me.  Momu immediately told me there was an incident w/Popa during dinner.  I decided to let them finish their meal and I waited in the lobby on the couch.  I was talking with the receptionist Dorothy - she thinks they are the cutest couple and even she thought they were moving into a double room this week.  So it is clear the entire facility understands the significant desire for them to be in the same living quarters.

Momu came out of the dining room about 15 minutes later - I gave her pistachios and she was happy as a clam and went right to them.  She then went back to the one story she has been telling me 3-4 times during my past 3 visits (about Townsend Harris school, how the school started, how Popa took the entrance test, which was very hard, etc.).  I truly think this story is triggered by her also telling me every time lately that she used to be married to a brilliant man and he has completely lost it.  I then told her I read an article about how we all come 'full circle' and that most people go back to infancy stage in their later years.  She was surprised to hear this and I think she liked hearing it - i.e. Popa is not alone in his behavior.  She said 'life was funny sometimes'.  I told her that was the understatement of the year.  She laughed.  I also asked if she had regular appointments with the MB Social Workers.  She said no, she only met them one time.  I then said, well, that is only based on what you remember, she again laughed and said I was right, so maybe she is meeting with them regularly - if not, she needs to if that is an option.  She asked me for her credit card - same old reason, I again changed the subject.

Then she told me  that Popa said some inappropriate things to one of the guys at their table during dinner (the doctor guy, don't know his name).  She proceeded to tell me she could not eat in the dining room anymore because of Popa's behavior and they would have to eat in their rooms. I wasn't there and can't provide specifics, but have put this together based on what Momu said and also what the Doctor said when he came out of the dining room - so the story may go something like this....

Popa may have been coughing, the doctor said something - I think to offer him something, Popa said something back like "go fuck yourself'.  Then, based on what the doctor told me - I believe the doctor made a 'jew' comment because the doctor told me he did say something to the fact that he could tell Popa was jewish by the way he said his inappropriate comment.  The doctor said he was angry and lashed out.  He told me understood Popa's condition and he told me the guys worked it out in the dining room.  Momu was listening to what the doctor was saying and I think felt better that the doctor forgave Popa and agreed to not have tables changed.  Popa came out and they talked and Popa said he was sorry and I had to tell him he said some inappropriate things - he did not remember, but his face told me he felt bad.

The doctor left, said no hard feelings.  I sat with Momu and Popa in the lobby for about another 15 minutes.  Popa was silent, Momu was telling me all kinds of stories from her childhood.  Then we went upstairs.  The both got into Momu's bed.  Popa then said to her "I love you even if you behave badly'. I told Momu she needed to tell him the same thing and she did.  They are soooo looking forward to being in the same room.

I took their Chinese Food order - Dan and I will be eating with them tomorrow night at MB.  Gee, guess what they want - no surprise here - won ton soup, spare ribs, egg roll (only for Momu) and General Tsao Chicken.  I also told the nurse that we would be bringing dinner.

I really felt like Momu's therapist today but all in a good way - it was actually a very nice visit and I will have them out of their room as much as possible in the future.  Left at 6:40

Tuesday October 25, 2011

Dan and I arrived at MB at 5:30 - I went into the dining room and found Popa staring at his plate - perogies - he said it did not appeal to him.  I left him to eat and went upstair to Momu's room- Dan was already w/her talking (she felt fine, but did not feel like eating in the dining room w/Popa - she said he is doing things to embarass her - i.e. said again that he is not the brilliant man she married - this has been a repeated thing with her and I then go into my 'circle of life' speech.  Momu requested pizza and beer (3 beers to be specific, she wanted to get drunk)- Dan went out to get it.

Dan came back with a small pizza w/meatballs, onions and peppers and only 1 cold 16oz Bud.  Dan also got himself a 24oz PBR.  I left them to finish and went downstairs to retrieve Popa from the dining room.  He was finishing his chocolate ice cream and had eaten a peanut butter and jelly sandwich - did not touch the hot entree.

I brought Popa to Momu's room and all 4 of us chatted for a while about diff things.  It was a very nice visit - we arrived and Momu was not in a great mood and we left and she was feeling just fine and only ended up having 1 piece of pizza and not even 1/2 of her beer.  The rest of the pizza pie went to the nurses - they were very thankful

While Dan was out getting the food, Momu only mentioned Joanne and the basement once - I decided to just ignore her - she was calm and I knew she would move onto a diff subject w/in minutes.  I then heard all the Uncle Mike stories that Dan heard yesterday.  I also heard alot of stories about the ring business and her working, being held up, etc.

We gave Popa his watch and he was happy.   Popa asked me how I was, I said good and then I asked him how he was - he said "fine, I think".  He clearly knows he can't remember shit anymore and has just accepted it and at times jokes about it.

We left at 7:15

So even though a double room does not look promising any time soon (we found this out today, but the social worker at MB will be the one to discuss it with Momu and Popa) MB is a great place and the nurses and staff are fantastic.

Monday October 24, 2011

Dan made tonights visit:  I got to MB just after dinner tonight and entered to see m & p sitting on the couch in the lobby. Momu was very tired and needed to rest before going up. She jokingly said it feels like she worked all day but all she did was get dressed. I heard all new stories about her uncle mike the cop and some of the things he did in ww1- actually really cool if you think about it and all the history she has in her mind. I got Popa a new watch band for his watch but I forgot it at home, I will bring it over tomorrow. He did not seem to care as five minutes after he ate dinner he did not know what he had. His response was it must not have been exciting haha

As soon as he got to his room he asked for a peanut butter and jelly sandwich and a chocolate milkshake. Momu was very tired and a bit dizzy but in good spirits. Jokingly she said if they don't get a room together that they are going to leave.  She was joking and the best part was she started packing up some stuff in her room to move into a double - NOT to go home! 

I mentioned that me and Erica would bring in Chinese food some time this week. Erica is leaving on Friday for a week and I leave on Sunday.   I will visit on Friday and Saturday and I get back Thursday so I can visit on Friday. 

Sunday, October 23, 2011

I did not get to MB today - I feel bad but will visit tomorrow after work and after my PT appointment

Friday, October 21, 2011

Today was a really good visit.  Longer than I usually stay, but they were both so talkative that I just stayed.  Not one word of negativity from Momu in the entire 2 hours I was there, that is unbelievable and quite the break through.  I arrived solo at 4:45 pm.
1. Popa was not sleeping and was excited to see me. He did not look as tired today and even asked me for his comb because he wanted to comb his hair before going to the dining room.
2. Momu was also awake, in her room (still stunk like heck), but she looked so much better today.  I knew she would be in a better mood because she called me during the day to ask me to bring her some pistachios. (took pistachios home, if she has diverticulitis no nuts allowed)   She DID NOT CALL ME to complain!!

I took Popa down to the dining room, he said hello to the gentleman at the table and said Hi to a few people on his way down.
I went back up to Momu - she was still a bit nervous about leaving her room and wanted to give it one more day before eating in the dining room.  She was in good spirits, I told her however, no pistachios for now, I don't want her stomach to go backwards and feel bad again, she totally agreed!!!
She then talked about the basement again and renting it to nurses - I told her she told me that yesterday and I told her it was a bad idea - she said, really??  I said yes, I said Popa can't go home.  I asked her if she wanted to leave without him - of course she said no way.  I then proceeded to tell her the good news about gertting a double room together - she was so excited and couldn't believe it. She smiled. 
She then went back to the 'going home' thing.  Again, I told her Popa can't leave and she asked me why.  I said:
He can't take care of himself.
The nurse then came in to change her heart patch.  Momu asked what it was for and she could not believe she needs this every day all the time.  She said she never had it at home and I said, Exactly!!  Probably why she landed herself in the hospital.  I then decided to be blunt - I told her she called me in early August to come over.  I told her we got to the house, she was passed out in bed, locked in her room (we found the key), Popa was not dressed and had not eaten in 2 days, 2 women were waiting for them to go to dinner (Momu forgot about the dinner date).  When she heard all of this,she could not believe it.  I said she landed in the hospital because she did not get the right medicine and was totally overwhelmed  with trying to take care of Popa.  She did not say another word.
Her dinner came, she ate meatballs and then again asked me about going home and I said the same thing.  I said things will feel alot better when they are in the same room, I will bring a big tv over, bring a dvd player over and even bring her easel over.  She smiled.  I said lets take one day at a time and she agreed, WOW!
I went down to the dining room to get Popa - brought him to Momu's room and then got them both ice cream - Popa wanted Vanilla, could not believe it, Momu and I laughed.  She had her usual strawberry.  Oh, did I mention she enjoyed her BUD while eating her meatballs - I got the ok from the nurse.  I also told Popa they would be together next week and he smiled so.    When he entered Momu's room, he was all lovey dovey and they kissed and were so happy to see each other.  I really believe once they are in the same room she will settle down.

We all chatted for a while, both in good moods.  I told them Paul and Paula would be visiting tomorrow and they were both very happy - Momu had nothing but good things to say about them - yippeeeee.
I also said I would bring some chinese food over when she felt better, she was excited about this.  And finally she told me about a funny movie that she watched a few years ago - something about naked men and a piano - enough said.

I left 2 hours after I arrived and left in a really good mood.

P.S.  Joanne - please be warned, Momu left you a voicemail on your cell phone.

Thursday, October 20, 2011

I did not know what to expect upon arrival today because Momu called Dad twice this morning telling him she needed to get the hell out of Meadowbrook.
I went into see Popa first - he was resting and woke up right away. He looked really tired today - but he got a shave!!! He walked into Momu's room and wanted to know if she was going downstairs for dinner. She said no so I walked Popa down. Almost at the elevator I heard him say 'Erica, Erica" turned around to find him standing with his pants at his feet. I laughed - asked where his belt was - he said he did not need a belt. I pulled his pants up, folded down the waist band and off to the dining we went. Chicken Marsala - he was happy.

I went back into Momu's room - still has some odor but I got passed it and sat on the edge of her bed. First thing was she told me that she needed to find a facility in Pittsfield because Meadowbrook was making her sick. Good news was she did not say she had to go home. I explained that they ran some tests and there was blood in her stool and they were waiting for some additional results before deciding how to treat her. She did not realize she may have more than an upset stomach. She then said she was fine before arrival at MB (going to abbreviate from now on) which is when I reminded her she was not fine and she was in the hospital for 2 weeks.

Then Dorothy told me that Momu had not picked out their meal choice for the period starting October 30th. I explained that to Momu and she said she would not be there that long. I decided to talk straight with her. I said Yes you will be here. Then she again asked for her credit card to start basement renovation. This time she is going to rent it out to 2 nurses from BCC and Momu would have a buzzer for when she needed help. Momu asked me if I thought that was a good idea. I said NO - told her Popa can't go home, she can't take care of him and he can't take care of himself. Popa needs to stay at MB and reminded her the most important thing was for them to stay together. She agreed and looked sad. We talked about 'circle of life' and the current situation was what it was. I told her they are still working on a double room and she smiled and said that would be wonderful.

Momu and I talked for about an hour - good memories of her best friend Helen and their kids. It was sweet. She also told me she was sad that Stephanie hasn't called yet. She got teary.

I left and had a chat with nurse on duty. The nurse confirmed that Momu's memory was as bad as Popa's. And this has resulted in Momu ringing the nurse buzzer all day long for the same thing!

Momu wants to paint and was upset she missed the session today. She has no interest in knitting.

I will continue to be as matter of fact as possible each and every time I visit with her.

Wednesday, October 19, 2011

No visit today - had a PT appt and the schedule just did not work.  I will be visiting Thursday for sure.

Meadowbrook Mailing Address and Info

For those friends and family that want to stay in touch with Momu and Popa - aka Herbert and Zelma Krasnow, address is as follows:

Meadowbrook of Granby

350 Salmon Brook Street

Granby, CT 06035

T:    860-653-9888

F:    860-653-8938

Cell:    917-675-2747 Speak real loud when my mom answers

Tuesday, October 18, 2011

Dad, Mark, Max and Maya visited with Momu and Popa for about an hour and a half (I had to work).  They were ok but very tired.  In fact, Momu was nodding off just before they went down to the dining room for lunch.

Dad met with Marlene (onsite Medicare expert) to review current medicare status (because Momu could not get PT or OT last week because she was very sick).  Medicare sees this as a patients refusal and therefore the Medicare coverage stops and patient becomes Private Pay - seems totally stupid to me.  Especially witnessing that Momu could barely walk to Popa's room on Sunday because she was extremely weak and dizzy from being sick all last week. 

Status on a double room:  Opening up of a double room is moving very slowly but M&P are number one on the list.

Monday October 17th 2011

I (Peter) am authoring today's blog for yesterday's visit to Meadowbrook since Erica was working all day.

Mark, Max, Maya and I arrived at Meadowbrook around 11 am and met Momu and Poppa in their rooms. Momu was dressed and put her makeup on and then we visited for an hour before their lunchtime. Poppa has been having his lunchtime meal in the first floor dining room while Momu was recovering from her stomach problems. She is fine again and said she would join Poppa for lunch for the first time in the dining room. We walked them down and the Activity Director Tracy gave them a corner table by themselves. Momu ate her entire meal while Poppa said he wasn't hungry.

Afterwards, we sat in the courtyard for about a half an hour in the sun. They looked good (photo attached). Then they were tired and asked to take them upstairs to lie down. We then left for our lunch.

When we returned at dinner time we found them both in the dining room at the same table but this time with two men that Poppa had been sitting with the week before. Momu was engaged in conversation, which I took as a really good sign. (photo attached)

After dinner we went to the second floor activity room where Momu instructed Maya on knitting while Poppa watched Max answer flash card math questions with various coin amounts. He was impressed, as was I.

Poppa was tired and I took him back to his room while the others remained in the activity room for another 1/2 hour. All in all a pretty positive day and hopefully they will continue to eat meals in the dining room where when they are seated an aide comes to their table and says "I am your waitress what would you like to eat and drink?"

This morning Mark, Max, Maya and I will visit folks before lunch and leave for New York City afterwards. I'm hoping the realization that Meadowbrook is a safe environment for them as Poppa turns 95 on October 30th and Momu 94 on November 16th.

Sunday, October 16, 2011

Me, Mark, Max, Maya and Dad arrived at Meadowbrook today at 11:30 am. Momu was still not feeling well but the good news is the nurse told us she only went to bathroom once in last 24 hrs so that means I knew the end was in sight.

We visited with Popa - he was happy to see the kids and Mark. It was a georgeous day so we took him outside to sit in the courtyard. We stayed until lunch was served. Popa is now eating lunch in the main dining room and sits with 2 other gentleman residents - he has been doing this for the past week.

We said goodbye and told Popa we would come back later

The kids had a fun filled day of activity - apple picking, core maze and lunch.

Momu called Dad's cell around 1:00 and told him she was feeling better and wanted us to visit now. So after our late lunch we went back to Meadowbrook - go there around 2:45. I took the kids right into Momus room and she was soooooo happy to see them. However her room was a bit smelly so she walked to Popa's room - right next door but because she has been sick, she is weak and felt dizzy walking.

Some pictures were taken and about 90 minutes later Momu said she was tired so she went to rest and we left. Momu brought up the basement renovation and taking in a college student as a boarder 3 or 4 times in the short amount of time we were there.

We will visit again tomorrow

Saturday, October 15, 2011

Dad came into town because Mark, Max and Maya were flying in for a visit. We met Dad at Meadowbrook at 3:30. Popa was awake and happy to see us. I got him an ice cream sandwich from freezer since he wanted a snack before dinner. I also suggested he needed to do something and he agreed to give the crossword puzzles a try. Momu stomach issues continued and the medicine is working if you know what I mean. Momu is very upset about being sick and did not want any company yesterday. She was very emotional.

I am hoping Momu feels better on Sunday since the entire gang will go over before lunchtime for a visit. The weather looks to be great so we will sit in the courtyard.

Oh yeah - Dad returned Popa's wallet and he was very relieved!

Friday, October 14, 2011

Dan went over around 3:15 since I was at work and we had dinner plans with friends. Both were sound asleep in their respective beds. He left

Thursday, October 13, 2011

Where do we start today, Erica and I went over for a visit at about 5 o'clock and stayed till almost 7.  I saw nurse Dorothy before we got to their room and she told me she just finished cleaning Momu up. (can we say supository). We walked in to Momu moaning with pain and her stomach very extended. She had called the nurse who was there to look at her stomach. Typical Momu when she does not feel well does not want visitors (Erica and I are exempt from this rule) and immediately said she could not see Mark and kids this weekend. Erica told her she will feel better in a day or so and she agreed. She is hoping to have some pizza and beer on Sunday!
 Her heart patch was changed and when the nurse touched her stomach she was in pain, the nurse realized that she had a 101.1 fever and gave her some tylenol and went to call the Dr. as she was concerned about the abdominal pain. Momu will get a belly X-ray tonight. They will also collect a specimin from bathroom.  After a half an hour of in and out of sleep, she perked up with our visit and said she was fine just was angry that she was sick, what does that mean?  
Popa greeted us with his usual questions every day, what day is it, where are we, how long of a drive is it to our house and so on.   However today he was really confused, asking lots of questions about his money, asked if he could rent out his house, asked what he was getting from social security, what his mutual funds were doing. The nurse told Erica that Popa has a session with the physchiatrist and that usually makes the residents very confused and riled up. The one thing Popa said he clearly remembers was that we spent $ 1000 dollars on a dumb dog.  He said he will never forget that. He was concerned he could not find his wallet, we assured him that Peter has it and was bringing it back.
Today he ate lunch in the dining room and clearly remembered having veal parm because he said it was great. He said he now weighs in at 138.5, so he is gaining weight.  

Until Momu's tummy issue is figured out she is on clear liquids only and once she had some broth she got some color back and  was still in and out of sleep and groaning.  

Poppa once again started to slip out of the walker seat which he should not be using as a chair, I picked him up before he fell and he said "I cant believe its me, SHIT I am as weak as a fish"  He had swedish meatballs for dinner and then some jello.   Popa said several times that he could not believe what was happening - meaning aging.

We left with Popa telling us how grateful he was for our being there and how lucky they are to have us around. We told them they did a good job with their family and that we were lucky to have them. We are set to see them tomorrow.

Wednesday October 12, 2011

No visit today - had to work late and had an appointment - will visit tomorrow

Tuesday October 11, 2011

Dan and I arrived at 5:15 pm. We were greeted by Nurse Ansha in the hallway. She told us Momu was not feeling well. Had stomach issues and was in a lot of discomfort earlier (they gave her a supository). Ansha told us Momu said she was dying - which means it must have been very painful. Knowing this we went to Popa's room to find him finishing dinner. As usual, he asked us our reason for the visit. He also said he was feeling 'blah' but no tummy issues, just blah. I asked him if he wanted to rest and he said yes and asked that we come back tomorrow. Momu's door was shut - Dan peeked in, she was fast asleep. We also know she did not want any dinner.

I will go back tomorrow but told Ansha that is Momu woke up and needed anything to call me.

So given today's visit I know they are in the right environment. If at home, Momu would be locked in her room and would have probably consumed gin to alleviate stomach issue. Popa would have not eaten anything because at home he relied on Momu for that.

Monday, October 10, 2011

Samantha here....

I went over for my last trip to visit them before I go back to school in the morning. Momu was sitting in the chair starring at her dinner while Popa already ate most of his meal and was lying in bed. I brought them a slice of challah to eat. Momu told me they fed Popa a good meal and she got crap. He got a meatball sub and she got dumplings and rice. She asked for something else so the nurse went and called the kitchen. It would take a little while for her new meal.

We brought over an apple pie yesterday that we never got to. So today I asked popa if he wanted some apple pie. He said wheres the ice cream. I said you want ice cream? He said with the apple pie of course. So popa had a big piece of apple pie and a whole cup of ice cream! Momu then started to get up and I asked where she was going. She said she was going to her room to lay down. I said her food will be here shortly and she said when they finally come back tell them to "shove it". She was upset that Popa got a good meal and she didn't like hers and that it was taking a long time for her food to come.

Popa finished his pie and ice cream and then said "this was breakfast right?" I said no it was dinner. He asked what time is it? I said 5:45pm. He then said "oh boy I'm fucked up". He then went to lay down and so I thought I'd say my goodbyes before they'd both fall asleep. Popa said he wants me back "sooner than later"!!

Momu requested a slice of pizza from Erica and Dan. she wants all the "stuff on it". They will bring that tomorrow.

Erica's addition:  I am not sure if Momu's being upset 'about the food' was truly about the food versus her continued delusion about making their basement a home for a college student to pay them rent and be a 24/7 Nurse to Popa.  I am sure I will here more tomorrow when I visit. But will stay on plan.

For anyone calling or planning a visit, please stick to the below message, which is based on advise from the Social Worker:

• Mom, I know you are sad about leaving the home;
• You took care of Dad as long as you could;
• Caring for him made you sick;
• There are not adequate funds for you to hire enough help at home; and
• You will need to stay at Meadowbrook for the care that both you and Dad need.

Because Momu is forgetful, she will ask these questions over and over.  This is typical and sometimes can go on for a very long time.  Gentle validation of her feelings and reinforcement of the actual plan is generally the best tactic.

Sunday, October 9, 2011

We arrived at 11:45 to find Momu and Popa sleeping in Popa's room. We walked them down to the activity room in their floor in order to get better wifi reception. Momu and Popa got to video chat with the Florida great grandkids. They both had smiles on their face the whole time.

We then went bsck to their room to wait for their lunch to come. During the 20 minutes before lunch arrived Momu kept repesting 'her plan' about refinishing the basement and having s college student pay them to live there AND take care of Popa full-time. We keep telling her that is not a realistic or feasible option. But I would not be surprised if she tried to call Joanne to have her husband start on putting a bathroom in the basement.

I left with Dan and Samantha around 1:00. Dad stayed for another hour and took Popa outside while Momu finished her lunch.

Late in the afternoon Momu realized she did not have a credit card to give to Joanne to start the basement project. She said she was angry but she could wait until next Sunday when Dad(Peter) came back. I must say while Popa does not know where he is - he is happy about getting fed consistently and pretty content. Momu, on the other hand has memory issues as well but is also delusional.

It sucks to get old

Take 2: Saturday October 8, 2011

Authored by Dad, aka Peter, aka Son:
Erica and Dan went to their Lake House and Samantha went over to Meadowbrook around 11 am to play bingo with Momu and Poppa. Each was asleep in their beds with their pajamas still one. Later we learned they were up earlier for breakfast and then just laid down to rest.
 
Peter went to Pittsfield to get a few things last night and stayed over. He packed the car and drove to the Diner residence to drop off items for use at a later date: lounge chairs, more videos, TV remotes and lots of plants. Some plants were left behind while a few others given to Joanne when she showed up to collect her Home Instead records. She plans to visit Momu and Poppa and misses them dearly.
 
Samantha and I arrived at Meadowbrook after lunch around 1 PM. They were up and looking good. We spent the afternoon with them and sat in the beautiful Meadowbrook patio area in the sun, which they loved...it was in the mid-seventies. Both were weighed by an aide: Momu at 100 even; Poppa at 133.
 
Samantha left to spend time with a close friend and I ventured to take them out to dinner at a local good restaurant Antonio's. The two of them with walkers was challenging but it went smoothly. They ate well and enjoyed themselves starting off with the classic Martini and Bloody Mary (Momu and Poppa respectively). I got a Bloody Mary too since Momu said make that two before I could order...I went along to keep the peace.
 
So from 4:30 to 6:30 everything was fine and after bringing them back to Meadowbrook I said good night and stay with the Dinners. Over all a very good day although Momu keeps saying "when we get home it will be fine because I have this plan to add bathroom in the basement for a student to be with us". I keep reinforcing that they have no money but it won't sink it so from here on in I just respond "we'll see" and then I shut up.

Saturday, October 8th

Samantha here...

I went over this morning at 10:45 am to play Bingo with Momu and Popa. Went upstairs to find Popa sleeping in Momu's bed and Momu sleeping in Popa's bed. Both were sound asleep. Decided to leave and not disturb them.

I went back around 2pm with Papa Peter to visit. Popa was wide awake sitting in a big chair next to the window sill. Momu was awake lying in bed. We talked for a few minutes and Momu believes she has a brilliant plan on how to live in their house again. She says she can charge 15 dollars for a college boy to live in their basement. Her friend is a plumber and they can put a bathroom in the basement. That way she can make all her money back to be able to take care of popa. I didn't want to have momu cry again so I just nodded along. The nurses say we should continue to tell her she is not leaving but I'd rather not say anything and just let momu talk. I finally heard the Milk story!! And many other stories that I've heard before.

After Popa asking more than 12 times, Popa's egg salad sandwich finally came. When it came he asked what it was and why its here. We decided to take it outside and go sit on the patio. Momu sat in the sun and read some of her book while Popa sat in the shade and ate his sandwich. Half of which was spit onto the floor. We sat outside for an hour or so and then Momu said its time to go lay down. At this point I left.

Papa Peter is taking them out to a restaurant for dinner. Goodluck to him!

It sucks to get old.

Friday October 7, 2011

Today was an important day - the long term plan was presented to Momu and Popa.  Dad (aka Peter, son) arrived at Meadowbrook around 9:30 am, met with the entire staff and then brought Momu and Popa into the discussion.  The message to Momu (Popa is passive and will go along with anything) is that it is Unsafe to be at home without 24/7 help.  She is unable to take care of Popa, let along herself.  At Meadowbrook all their daily needs are being taken care of and addressed.  They are getting 3 square meals a day, the meds are being monitored, their activity/therapy is being given daily.  This was NOT happening at home and as a result, Momu ended up completely overwhelmed and stressed, resorted to some extra beer and gin and ended up in the hospital.

The day progressed nicely, Samantha and I AND DAISY arrived around noon.  Everyone was so happy to see Daisy, but Momu was very happy to see Samantha, as was Popa.  The other great thing that happened today is that Momu moved into a private room, right next door to Popa.  Not yet together in the same room, but a HUGE step in the right direction!  Relief that helped with the delivery of the Long Term Plan.  Momu and Popa fed Daisy some of their lunch, thankfully it was baked chicken.  Samantha, Daisy and me left around 2:00.

Samantha and I went back to Meadowbrook around 4:00 pm, Popa was in Momu's bed in her new room.  We started talking about stuff and were watching Dr. Oz having a nice visit.  But then somehow a 'chair' from the house was mentioned and Momu sort of snapped.  She said to keep stuff in their house for when they come home.  Dad then had to remind Momu of the meeting in the morning about how it was unsafe to go home, Popa needed to be here, etc.  She then started to cry. She went into the bathroom.  Dad then proceeded to tell Popa that Momu was upset because we want her to stay at Meadowbrook.  Again, Popa is passive and will go along with whatever.  Momu came out of the bathroom, still sobbing and sad.  Samantha went to the liquor store to get her some Beefeaters Gin and olives.  We gave her a small amount.  We all ended up leaving about 5:50 and she was still crying.

It is sad, it sucks to get old, but for whoever is reading this - the social workers and staff at Meadowbrook all agree we all have to be consistent with the message - "it is unsafe to go home, Popa needs to be supervised around the clock, and the most important thing is that the are together under the same roof".

Wednesday October 5, 2011

Arrived at Meadowbrook at 4:25 pm to find Momu and Popa sound asleep in their respective rooms. Turned in paperwork for my dogs so they can visit. May go back later but not sure. Nurse Dorothy said she would tell them we were there. And the dinner option for tonight looked good - Ziti Bolognese

Tuesday October 4, 2011

We arrived at 4:45. M&P were resting in the single bed together. They woke up right away and Momu warned us she was mad and very grumpy. She can't understand why she goes to the therapy room everyday and Popa does not. She is angry because 'he needs it more than me'. We need to check with PT and/or doctor tomorrow. It could be as simply as Popa being walked upstairs while she is downstairs and she may not realize this.  This coupled with not being in the same room is becoming a real point of contention with her.  she said, its stupid, how would he feel if he shared a room with someone and I was all alone, I bet he would like that " But a few minutes in, I convinced her to walk to the library cart w/me to get a book. She did and walked pretty well.  She picked one of my favorites - James Patterson's 'Cross'.  On the way back to the room, there was a milk carton on the dinner cart so of course she proceeded to tell me about how her friend Minna  who paid her a penny to drink her milk.

Dinner arrived and it looked quite good - chicken caesar salad, caprese salad, chicken soup and chocolate ice cream.  Momu ate very well, Popa ate just a small amount of salad but ate both his and her ice creams and then a piece of pound cake which was in the 'food drawer'.

As we were ready to leave, Popa asked if it was time to leave and if he had to leave and we said no, he was relieved. He looked a bit tired today.  I asked Momu if there was anything special she wanted and she said with a very large smile, yes, a big tall glass of gin.  On our way out we checked in at the nurses station and found out Momu can have a 12 oz beer a day.  Dan drove to the liquor store, got one can of Bud and brought it back to her - she was happy happy and said to Dan 'you are a doll, now I can sleep well tonight".  I think if they were in a room together and not living out of a suitcase there would be no issues.  We have to let Momu know that poppa is getting some kind of PT just at the same time as she goes down stairs, We feel she comes up and asks him if he had any excercise and he doesnt rememeber so he says no.  She feels if she turns down the PT they will give it to him.  She complained to the nurses that they are doing too much for him.  Maybe we can get Budweiser to use Momu as a poster lady, as she is a big fan.

Monday, October 3, 2011

Dan and I arrived at Meadowbrook around 4:45 this afternoon.  Popa was in bed in Momu's room and Momu was in the bathroom.  Popa asked if we were ready to go downstairs for dinner, at which point Momu asked him if he knew where he was and he did not.  He then asked us all where he was.  Momu told us that she was very busy today with PT and also was interviewed.  She was pretty sure she proved she was not crazy.  She chuckled when she said that.
Since it was close to dinner time, we walked down to Popa's room - Momu used the walker and did good, Dan wheeled Popa in the wheelchair.  Dinner was served.  Baked fish sandwiches and chicken noodle soup.  Popa said he was hungry but did not eat very much at all.  Momu ate well.  We watched more of the home movies and Momu repeated a different story to me 3 times w/in 30 minutes.  Then proceeded to tell us the same story about getting paid a penny by a friend to drink her friends milk - this is one she tells us everytime. It must be the milk on her dinner try that triggers that story.
Momu has requested a slice of pizza with everything on it - will deliver that tomorrow.
I was happy to know they did not realize I had not visited in 3 days.
Below is a collage of Meadowbrook:

October 1, 2011

Momu and Popa had lots of visitors today:  Christine, Christopher, Paul and Paula.  They spent about 4 hours at Meadowbrook and accompanied Momu to her PT appointment.  After 20 minutes or so, she was pooped out.  I think the scheduled amount of PT time was supposed to be for 45 minutes.  I will find out on Monday when I visit and talk w/nurses.

October 2, 2011

Feeling a bit under the weather today so no Meadowbrook Momu and Popa visit today.
Will visit after work tomorrow and report back then.